I’m With You Sister!!

Dear Keithi Kilonzo,

I would first like to Thank you.  Thank you for showing all women all over the country that the fact that you have a vagina puts you at a disadvantage. The whole country opened their hearts to you regardless of their political affiliation; you were not asking for justice, you were demanding it. Secondly I would like to extend my deepest sympathies. For the loss of your father and for the bittersweet bite you must have experienced while watching your brother win the Makueni Senator seat.

I say bittersweet because although he is blood, and you are undoubtedly happy for him I know that deep down inside you wish that that could have been you. From a person who has followed Kenyan politics ever since I had the ability to critically think and analyze I understand why you thought you could get away with it. People in government have literally gotten away with murder, what is the harm in a little voter fraud? At the end of the day your competitor from Jubilee was also trying to stand in the by-election even though he was in direct violation of the law (constitution states that you have to be a member of a political party that you are contesting a seat with for more than three months prior to the election – Professor Kaloki stood on the Wiper ticket on March 4th but contested the by-election on a NARC ticket), why should he be cleared while you are barred? Because you are a woman? Because you are Kilonzo’s daughter? Because you are a CORD candidate? Whatever the reason the High Court ruled that you would not be allowed to stand.

Let me offer some completely unsolicited words for wisdom that my father has said to me many a time “good for you.” Because of what happened to you, you will learn, people who look up to you will also learn.  I myself have learnt from your experiences and I am applying those lessons in my everyday life as we speak. You should not steep to the level of those very men you are trying to defeat. You should show them practically that you are of a higher moral standing, very highly educated, well mannered and simply you have common sense. You are different, do not fade into the rotten crowd of all men that you are rolling with. YOU ARE DIFFERENT! Look at your accomplishments: representing Moi and winning, going to the East African Court of Justice and winning against the government of Kenya, you’re academic achievements etc the list goes on. By definition you are different. You have accomplished so much in such a little time and you are just getting started. Those men fear you, the ones in your crew and the ones in government. BY all means necessary do not give them a reason not to. Leave them trembling in their boots. 

Take the next five years to ensure that all your papers are in check, everything you need is in place and you have a team of quite serious HONEST hard working professionals behind you.

Take the next five years to travel the country still accomplishing things that a small would-be blogger from Nairobi only dreams about.

Take the next five years to inspire others to do unimaginable things. 

Most importantly take the next five years to show Kenyans, to show the ruling government, to show the world that Keithi Kilonzo is force to be re-conned with, and she is not going anywhere. 

Keithi please understand that since the death of Tom Mboya in 1969 and the death of J.M Karuiki in 1975, this country has not seen anyone who is so well versed with the laws of the land, the needs and wants of the people and someone who cuts across all ethnic and tribal lines drawn by our “leaders.” This country cannot afford to let you slip into political oblivion. We just cannot afford it. So many people stood by you as you fought to stand in the by-election, stand by us and help us demand for our rights and freedoms. 

Yours Truly,

Leyla Ismaily.  

Musings of A Single Girl in A Relationship: Love is Simple

“I want painful, difficult, devastating, life-changing, extraordinary love.”

Olivia Pope (Kerry Washington “Scandal”)

The most important thing that I’ve learnt from being in a healthy relationship is that this quote right here, is a big fat lie. Love is simple. At the end of the day, it is only a four letter word. You can still have the I-missed-you-all-day-even-though-I-saw-you-in-the-morning kind of sex, the passionate-wild-animal sex, and yet still the I-love-you-more-than-anything in the world sex. But it’s not just about the sex; it’s also about the emotions. Who in this world honestly enjoys things that are difficult, or devastating, or painful?? Who in this world wants to be angry, upset and depressed all the time because of the one that they love? Isn’t that completely contradictory to everything love stands for??

I don’t dispute that “devastating love” does exist, as I have firsthand experience.  This allows me to confidently say, that this love never lasts. One person cannot live through those negative feelings continuously. It’s just not humanly possible. In addition this love is often just a figment of our imagination. Despite all of the negative feelings that someone will go through during this devastating love, they will hold on as long as they can because they believe eventually it will amount for something. The sad truth is, once you go through all those negative emotions that something that you are hoping and praying for never comes. The negative emotions become part and parcel of the relationship. Who would want to be in a relationship with a black shadow cast on it? It just doesn’t make sense.

Love is simple in the sense that the person you love should be your best friend. They should be the person you run to in times of need; the first person you want to share good news with, love should not be complicated. Real love, is exactly that it’s real. It happens every day. It’s holding hands at the supermarket, spending a quiet night in watching a movie, crying on the phone about how big of an asshole your boss is. It’s not crying on the phone to your girlfriends about how big of a dick your boyfriend is, or waiting for him outside his place to see if he’s coming home with another girl, or going through his messages to see if he’s cheating.

Love is life-changing true because your life isn’t the same once that person cements themselves as a pillar of positivity in your life. They change the way you think, the way you act. Unintentionally, but still, you want to be the person you think is worthy of their love. That makes sense.

Love is life-changing, love is simple.

 

The Side-Chick Story

The Side-Chick Story

Do you remember at the end of the season finale for Scandal how Olivia turns the President down, and how he returns to his wife and Olivia proceeds to go running with her hair tied back looking all boss and shit?? That is such a fallacy.

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In real life, the guy will NEVER leave his wife for the side-chick. It just doesn’t happen and when it does, that is the exception.

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So how exactly does the side-chick come to be? How does the situation arise? 3 things:

  • The Man who everyone knows is unavailable hooks up with the side-chick.
  • The Side-chick allows this to become a regular thing.
  • The Wife of the said unavailable man, against her better judgement allows this to continue.

It’s shocking, I know.

Let’s start with Mr. Unavailable. One thing I just can’t take away from this guy is that he loves his girlfriend. In his own sick and twisted way, he really loves her. And when only one regular side-chick is involved, he also feels something for her, whether it is strictly located in his trouser section or if it be pity. But there definitely feelings involved. Many people often wonder HOW? If he truly loves his girlfriend then why does he need to go and dip his stick into someone else? This is something that only a man, or specifically the man in question can answer. It may because he had too much to drink that one time and then it becomes a regular thing, because of the thrill of feeling someone else’s skin against his. Or because of the fact that he likes the side-chick, has always had a thing for her but then he doesn’t see her as “wifey” material. There is a whole list of reasons.

Then there is the Wife in question. If she ever does find out about the side-chick she immediately plays the victim. Lashing out at the man and calling the side chick all sorts of names. But she had a part to play. Ladies let’s not lie to ourselves, we all know our men in and out. We know their routine and in some cases lack of routine. It is in our feminine chemical structure to notice when something is amiss.  When your man finds himself a side-chick you know but you pretend to go about life like butterflies and daisies. Why? Because you love him and you don’t want to believe that he could do something like that to you. Secondly, it could mean possible failure on your part, you weren’t fulfilling your job description so he has resulted to out sourcing. But somewhere deep downside the main chick always knows about the side chick.

Lastly there is the side chick, my personal favourite. J In some cases all that is said about her is true. She is a vindictive bitch who only wants to go about town wrecking homes. In majority cases she truly has feelings for Mr. Unavailable and she just wants to be with him. At all costs, even if that means sharing him with some conceited bitch that doesn’t deserve him. Mr. Unavailable in true male fashion takes advantage of these feelings and gets his dick’s worth. In some cases the side-chick is the victim. At the end of the day when the wife finds out about the side chick and gets mad at Mr. Unavailable, she’ll eventually take him back. The side-chick will be left all alone, with only memories. I guess at the end of the day – SHAME ON HER- she should have known better because she was fully aware Mr. Unavailable was unavailable but she continued to give him her body.

In all cases, sometimes you just can’t help how you feel.